DRRTY GRLZ R HOTT

My life is crazy right now. Unsure about my job. Unsure about my life. And very unsure of my feelings towards Christian. He and I had gotten into this huge argument and I decided that it would be best if we don't talk and that he picks up and drops off the girls at my gram's every week. But instead, he brought the girls to my house last nite so I had no choice but to see him. We barely spoke, just looked at eachother intensely. Then he left and I received a text message from him saying that I looked beautiful. Then today, I get this phone message from him. He says, I have something really important to talk to you about, so please call me. So, I call. He says that he's been looking into apartments for me up in Nashua and scoping out job prospects and he wants the girls and I to move up there and start our lives over fresh. And he said because I didn't have the money, he would help me out as much as possible. WTF is that!!!! I just hate how he does this to me ALL the time! Its like, he doesn't want me, but no one else can have me either. And now, of course, I have all these mixed emotions reguarding him AGAIN!!!!!! I just wish that he would make up his friggin mind so I can get on with my life. Everytime I start to think about him, I cry and I get further and further into this depression and it really friggin sucks!!! Well, Im off to bed. I can't take this shit anymore.